


Positive Work Relationship

by flowersheep



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-28 11:13:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10097300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowersheep/pseuds/flowersheep
Summary: Severus Snape is not at all impressed with the young new History of Magic professor claiming to be the Prince of Enchanters.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Years ago I started writing a fifth year AU in which Professor Binns manages to wander into the afterlife, leaving Hogwarts without a History of Magic professor, which obviously must be filled by Merlin. I don't know if that fic will ever see the light of day, seeing as it's just been gathering dust for several years now, but it seemed like a shame to waste this scene so I pulled it out, polished it up, and voila! Here it is!

Severus Snape refuses to believe that the most famous wizard to ever live has come to Hogwarts to teach history. In fact, Severus Snape refuses to believe that the most famous wizard to ever live is even alive. Obviously this is all some kind of elaborate hoax and it irks him that Dumbledore and Minerva have been so easily taken in by it. He’s almost embarrassed for them, actually. They’re adults, fully grown adults and highly skilled practitioners of magic and here they are buying into some little halfwit’s bollocks. It’s ludicrous. As ludicrous as a lady rising out of a lake and telling Minerva to go to London, knock on the door of a random flat, and ask the occupant to come teach History of Magic. What sort of person would willingly live in a lake? Not beside a lake, which Severus imagines would be very nice and peaceful, but actually in the lake. Ludicrous. And somehow the other staff members are all being taken in by it as well.

Oh they were skeptical at first, questioning the authenticity of someone claiming to be the Prince of Enchanters himself. Especially when their new History of Magic professor first walked through the front door. Merlin Emrys hardly cuts an impressive figure. He’s tall, sure, but thin and clearly very young. He barely looks older than the seventh years. Severus was gratified during the introductions to see many other professors looking skeptical. Until Emrys agreed to demonstrate a bit of magic for them. Then it was all ooo-ing and aw-ing as if none of them had ever seen a drop of magic in their entire lives.

So that leaves it up to Severus to prove to everyone that they’ve been had. When he declares his intentions the next morning at breakfast he gets a lot of eyerolls from his fellow teachers and an indulgent smile from Dumbledore. Severus ignores them. They can mock all they want, but he’ll show them.

Hogwarts’ newest professor has claimed an empty tower for himself, a fact which does absolutely nothing to endear him to Severus, who has to climb one too many winding staircases before he can knock on Emrys’s door. He waits impatiently until he hears a call for him to enter, then barges right on in. He planned to go in wands blazing to try and catch Emrys off guard, but finds his words dying in his throat. Being a wizard, Severus has seen many strange things in his life. This is quite possibly the strangest.

“This place is so _magical_!” Emrys exclaims from where he’s pressed up against one of the castle walls, eyes closed and arms stretched out as if… as if he were _hugging_ the wall.

Severus clears his throat, trying to regain his momentum. “Yes,” he begins, tone dry. “Well, this _is_ a school of magic.” No, he does not like this strange man at all. There had to have been someone else they could’ve gotten. Anyone. At this point he'd even take the Giant Squid.

“I can tell you weren’t hugged enough as a child,” Emrys says. He opens his eyes and detaches himself from the wall. “What can I do for you, Professor…”

“Snape.”

“What can I do for you, Professor Snape?”

“I just wanted to ask you a few questions,” Severus says and finds himself being observed with a critical eye. It’s distinctly unsettling, like all his layers are being peeled away until he’s left with nothing to protect himself.

“I’m not in the habit of proving my identity to people,” Emrys says. “I’ve learned that people either believe me or they don’t and trying to persuade them otherwise is far more trouble than it’s worth.” There’s silence for a long moment as Severus stares and Emrys simply waits.

“You can’t possibly be Merlin,” Severus blurts. “Merlin lived a thousand years ago!”

“Fifteen hundred, actually, but it’s a common misconception, go on.”

Severus clenches his fists to stop himself from doing something stupid. Like hexing Emrys. Or just punching him. Punching would be good as well. “It’s impossible!” he snaps.

“Not impossible,” Emrys corrects. “There are actually a number of ways to achieve some measure of immortality. Philosopher's stone, unicorn’s blood, a couple of really weird spells I found in this moldy old book.” Emrys frowns, eyes wandering up to the ceiling in thought. “Where is that book…?”

“Have you used any of those?” Severus asks.

Emrys blinks, looking at him once more. “Hm? Oh, no. I never really got into alchemy, I’ve seen what happens when you kill a unicorn, and when I say really weird spells I mean _really_ weird spells. If I recall right, one of them had to do with eating a piece of bark soaked in wine while hanging upside down from a tree. And that wasn’t even the strangest one.” Emrys frowns again. “Or was that something I did after getting drunk at a yule celebration one year?” he shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s so hard to remember what happened when these days, you know?”

This conversation is not going at all how Severus imagined it. “So you admit you’re a fraud!” he accuses, choosing to cling to the one thing he can make sense of: methods of immortality and Emrys’s admittance to having used none of them.

“Look, I really wish I could explain it,” Emrys says. “Trust me, you have no idea how weird it is to wake up one day and realize that you can’t die, especially when you know for a fact that someone stabbed you the night before. Fatally. There was a lot of blood. Especially since some idiot pulled the knife out even though I told them not to. I mean, I was the trained physician there, you’d think they’d listen to me, but apparently not. Anyway, I really wish I had a logical explanation for you, Professor, but I don’t. I don’t even have a logical explanation for myself.” His eyes light up with inspiration. “Hey, I know, I could stab myself! Right here and now! I know exactly how to do it to make sure I’m good and dead as quick as possible and then you just have to wait a few minutes and you’ll see me pop back to life with your own eyes!”

“No!” Severus says firmly before Emrys can go in search of a knife. “No, that’s not necessary.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Because I’d really like to have a positive working relationship with everyone here and if this is the best way to prove to you-”

“I’m quite sure.”

Emrys nods. “Alright then. If you change your mind though-”

“I won’t.”

“Right. But if you do-”

Severus glares and Emrys puts his hands up in surrender, smiling disarmingly.

“Fine, fine, no stabbing,” Emrys promises. He drops his hands. “Now, is there anything else you wanted to discuss or is that all?”

“I think that’s all,” Severus says.

“Okay.” Emrys turns away and goes right back to hugging the wall. “Nice having a chat with you, Professor Snape. We should do it again some time.”

Severus stares at his newest colleague for a moment longer before turning around and leaving, trying to decide if it’s too early for a strong glass of fire whiskey. A very strong glass.


End file.
